An unrelentingly boring conversation on The View triggered Whoopi Goldberg into full Goldberg pre-collapse cautionary mode (but didn’t reach full Goldberg collapse status) bright and early on Wednesday morning.

The near-incident came amid a Hot Topics chat about “a new trend in Japanese clubs and pubs” that sees venues “handing out color-coded wristbands to let people know what kind of mood” they’re in, Goldberg told the audience. At this point, her bright tone gave no indication that anything was wrong. Zero alarms detected.

“If you’re in a red band, it just means you’re out for a quiet drink and to leave me alone. Yellow signals that you’re open to some idle conversation, but not too much.

And green means you’re open for everything,” Goldberg said, while Sara Haines jabbed the actress’ innuendo by saying, “Not everything! Every type of conversation.”

Goldberg, her head still very much in the game, joked: “I think that’s part of the conversation! Do you want to? Yes, I do. If you’re wearing that, don’t be surprised if you get that question!”

Things moved along swimmingly, with Goldberg even observing that “it will dictate what you wear, too, because if you wear long sleeves, you have to make sure it’s visible for the person.” Laughter! Applause! It was great!

Conservative panelist Alyssa Farah Griffin quipped that she’s “only at a bar anymore if I’m alone traveling” and that she often wants “no one to talk to me other than the bartender,” leading to cohost Sunny Hostin’s comical question of, “Why not just drink at home?” More audience laughter! They were on a roll!

And yet, somewhere between Goldberg’s clothing observation, Hostin’s input, and Haines saying that a red band would attract “the wrong type of guy” — bridged together by several moments of silence from the moderator seat — the overwhelming weight of apathy possessed Goldberg’s body in the moments that followed.

Whoopi Goldberg grows bored with a conversation on ‘The View’.ABC

The camera then cut to a wide shot amid the hosts turning the conversation toward producer Brian Teta, who maintained that, while he’s “happily married,” he found something intriguing about trying to challenge a red-band-wearing woman to talk to him.

In frame, Goldberg’s head had somehow slipped its way into the palm of her hand — which, historically, is an EXTREMELY BAD (!!!) sign for any given Hot Topic that doesn’t live up to the star’s standards.

Haines’ emergency preparedness senses picked up on Goldberg activating pre-collapse mode, and she placed her hand on the Ghost actress’ arm as the 69-year-old’s head began sinking lower and lower toward the table’s surface as a disinterested expression washed over her face.

It appeared that Haines’ comforting touch saved Goldberg from diving down to the depths of disinterested despair, and Goldberg snapped back to life in that moment: “Are we done? Okay,” she said. “It doesn’t matter what I wear, people are going to talk to me anyway.”

The show then went to a commercial break, and all was well at the Hot Topics table once again.

The View airs weekdays at 11 a.m. ET/10 a.m. PT on ABC.